LIFE’S A GRIND
Jack Scribe
__________________________
Chapter 3, LOVE – AIN’T IT GRAND?
A blast of December wind hit Zach
Carlson when he exited the Century Mall. The biting, cold wind from the lake
temporarily distracted him from the hurt and anger he felt because of Gio’s
wandering lust. He pulled up the collar of his jacket and walked a couple
of blocks to where his car was parked.
The
nine-year old Ford looked cold, dirty and lonely under the stark streetlight.
‘Thank God we haven’t had much snow so far,’ Zach thought as he opened the
door. ‘And I’ve got cloth seats.’ He remembered his boyhood years in Minnesota
during the ferocious winter months and his dad’s car that had freezing leather
seats. The engine struggled to engage when he turned the key and the headlights
dimmed noticeably lower as the starter groaned. He turned off the headlights
and tried the ignition again. The puny, inline engine of the Probe came to
life…much to Zach’s relief. ‘Memo to self,’ he thought. ‘Gotta get over to
Pep Boys this weekend and buy a new battery before I’m shit outta luck.’ He
figured that he could get another year of service out of the reliable ride
that he had bought used while in college.
Because
the car had been parked next to a residential alley, there was no problem
leaving the parking space and easing out into the street. ‘With no fresh snow
the trip from the gym to our apartment shouldn’t take more than ten minutes,’
Zach judged as he turned north on Clark Street. ‘I gotta figure out how to
approach this topic of his wandering so that he knows I’m serious. But if
I can’t come to some understanding with Gio about a committed, monogamous
relationship, maybe one of us should look for another place to live,’ he considered.
He loved Gio Lombardi but not to the point of sharing his incredible, tight,
muscled body…with someone else.
Zach
was a WASP from the Midwest who kept his emotions in check but had a warm,
romantic glow in his heart; Gio was of Italian heritage from Philadelphia
and was quite demonstrative and open with his temperament as well as his affection.
Zach was reserved and reflective; Gio was gregarious and spontaneous. Zach
was almost compulsive in neatness; Gio might forget to pick up his dirty laundry
that gathered on the bedroom floor for a few days. One point of commonality
was intellectual curiosity and academic achievement; both had graduated with
high marks from Penn State. On most issues, the contrast worked and they were
an example of proving that opposites attract. At night in bed, like two companion
pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, Zach’s smaller, compact gymnast build fit comfortably
into Gio’s tall, six-two, muscular, resting frame.
‘Christ…we’ve
been together four years and I still need to use a fuckin’ rubber,’ Zach thought
while he passed the dark, imposing, architectural hulk that was Wrigley Field.
He turned off Clark, preceded west on Waveland and automatically scanned for
available, legal parking spaces. After Gio’s slip back into promiscuity at
the ‘rocks’ beach area the previous summer, Zach decided his health was too
important to risk any unwanted STD gift…or worse. Along with telling his lover
that trust was a big issue – and therefore the condoms until further notice
– there was a discussion about being faithful and not screwing around with
strangers. Gio pleaded that he was always safe and promised not to stray but
Zach kept a short leash on his wayward lover all fall. After Thanksgiving,
however, the flirting began again…this time at the gym in subtle ways with
clients and random, hot members…and that was a bad sign. ‘Promoting business
is one thing…offering your asshole as a bonus is something else,’ Zach considered.
He found a parking space within a block before their apartment and walked
the rest of the way to the weatherworn, wood frame three-story structure that
was home.
A
smile crept over Zach’s face when he remembered Gio’s rationale in choosing
the place the summer of ’04: “Just consider it as a temporary, lovers’ flophouse
that fits our budget. Look at it this way; neither of us needs to impress
a blind date.”
‘Let’s
keep it that way.’ Zach inserted the key in the building’s front door. Once
inside, he pulled off his gloves and cap before checking the mailbox. ‘Gio’s
definitely been here,’ he decided when he discovered the box was empty. Although
it was a little early for Christmas cards, junk mail and bills were part of
their daily lives. While walking up the stairs to the next floor and their
rear apartment, Zach decided to let himself in, very quietly, to romantically
surprise his lover. Chances were that Gio was in the bedroom either reading
the latest issue of Muscle and Fitness, watching CNN or a combination
of both.
He
muffled the latch re-engaging as he closed the door and looked about the lighted
living area. Voices coming from the bedroom were not part of a TV program.
Zach gritted his teeth and sudden heat pounded his head when he noticed the
clothes strewn about the floor. ‘Fuck,’ he thought. ‘Two sets of briefs and
a smaller pair of jeans.’ He took a deep breath, surveyed all the tossed-about
apparel, picked up the unrecognized Lucky denims and pulled out a wallet.
The driver’s license said that the guest – make that Gio’s fuckmate – was
Sebastian George Gray with a Lake Shore Drive address. ‘Hmm, 1980. Makes the
trick 26. Not a bad looking dude from the picture. I’ve seen him at the gym…guess
he goes by his middle name. I remember him being called George.’
“Oh,
Gio, you are a dog,” a voice said with a chuckle.
“Yeah…a
dog that wants to fuck. Let me get you wet. We gotta get outta here soon cuz
my roomy will be back,” Gio said with a raspy tone.
“Shit,
you really know how to work that hot tongue of yours. Ahhh…” The sounds of
moans and slurping continued for a few minutes. “Need to get stretched and
open…um, a couple of fingers should do.”
“Let
me get some lube,” Gio replied.
“You
have some rubbers?”
Zach
could only imagine that Gio was playing around with George’s hole before slamming
that big Italian dick into it. ‘That’s funny…Gio always wants to get fucked,’
he thought, a little puzzled at the role reversal.
“In
the drawer. Condoms are something we, um…I’ve got plenty of.”
A
rustling sound coming from the bedroom left no doubt in Zach’s mind what was
happening. He realized that the easiest thing was to force a lively confrontation
but the flash-in-the-pan approach was not his style. Instant anger created
problems that resulted in saying and doing things that they may regret later.
‘I gotta get Lombardi by himself after this blows over,’ he decided while
grinding his teeth. ‘But it’s going to blow over on my terms,’ he decided
as an idea of how to deal with the situation began to germinate.
“Hey,
stud, wrap your legs around me,” Gio growled.
“Go
slow until I get used to…” George grunted for a few moments before letting
out a long sigh. “Hold it…oh, oh…a little more…ahhh…”
“Nice
and hot. Man it feels good in there.”
“Just
give me a sec until I get used to your fuckin’ tool. Um, this guy, Zach, your
roommate...are you guys a couple? Oh, yeah…”
“We
have, yep…a couple. That a problem for you?”
“Not
if you don’t mind. That cock of yours is too good to pass up. Go in ju…just…there,”
George said. “Ohhh…that’s the spot.”
“Man,
um…ahhh…let’s see what my cock can do...for both of us.”
“That’s
it. Work that monster.” George groaned deeply as his demands were physically
answered.
‘See
if you get my monster anytime soon,’ Zach thought as he went about and collected
all of the clothing and shoes he didn’t recognize. In the pocket was a Lexus
car key and remote lock control. ‘This guy’s wheels shouldn’t be too hard
to find.’ He bundled up everything he could find that was probably George’s
property – except for the winter jacket and the solo car key detached from
the remote – and quietly left the apartment. He could hear Gio yelling his
trademark ‘dirty talk’ when he closed the apartment door. Zach went downstairs,
out the front and onto the sidewalk. He shook his head at the bedroom bullshit
he had just heard. Gio and he were both at a respectable six inches; neither
qualified to be registered in the ‘monster’ category. ‘Flattery will get you
fucked every time.’
He
quickly strolled west on Waveland and pushed the remote every time he approached
a Lexus. In the next block, a piercing beep and flashing lights announced
he had found Gray’s car. ‘Not bad,’ Zach judged when he approached the late
model sedan. He quickly opened the trunk and tossed in all the clothing and
shoes. After he wiped the wallet and remote clean of any fingerprints, the
remaining items joined the wadded apparel. As much as Zach wanted to dispose
of everything into the nearest dumpster, he only wanted Georgie boy to hurt
a little and remember not to fuck around with someone else’s man. ‘For Gio,
this will be a major message,’ he thought while closing the trunk.
Next
stop should be a cooling off spot, like the Goose Island Brew Pub for a beer.
But first he called Gio’s cell from the street. After four rings, the call
was answered.
~~~
“Hi,” Gio said a little breathlessly. “Whazzup?”
“Hi…it’s
me. Just wanted to let you know I’ve stopped off for a beer and maybe some
chow at Goose Island. You wanna join me?” The street was very quiet and didn’t
disclose where Zach actually was.
~~~
“ I dunno. It’s, um, around 9:30 an’ kinda cold,” Gio replied before creating
a sound that indicated he was placing his hand over the phone mouthpiece.
“Think
it over. There’s a b-ball game on TV that looks good. If you don’ see me in
a few minutes it means that I’ll be here for a while. Gimme a call if you
change your mind...or I’ll see you at home.” Zach thought that should add
a little confusion to the issue. Gio didn’t really know when to expect his
roomie and partner. He was privately amused at the image of Sebastian George
Gray – the weasel – not finding any of his clothing or keys in the living
room. ‘That fucker knew Gio and I were a couple and he didn’t give a shit.
All he wanted was a dick up his chute.’
~~~
“Um, yeah, I’ll give you a call if I don’t see you first. Bye, babe.”
“Bye,
bye.” ‘Babe, your lousy ass,’ Zach thought as he walked towards Clark Street.
‘Well, maybe the ass was not so lousy…but whadda whore.’ He shook his head
and considered the next step handling Gio. ‘Is it worth the aggravation? Yeah,
to a point.’ But he felt that the final ‘point’ was being approached.
The
bar was fairly quiet but Zach wasn’t surprised. Tuesday in early December
was not a great time for a sports bar or brew pub in Chicago. The Bears had
performed winning miracles this season and it was too early to see if the
Bulls were going to have another building year. He slid into a booth and noticed
the televised game was from Denver. ‘Well, I guess it’s just a matter of waiting
to see if Gio comes in…or calls.’ A perky, big-bosomed waitress came over
and took his order for a glass of India dry ale and a brat. After the beer
arrived, he mulled over the evening’s events – and the past couple of weeks
– mentally running through his options.
‘Do
I love him? Yes,’ he decided. ‘Love him enough to turn my back to his horny
messing around? Don’t think so. The ball will be in his court.’ Zach could
only imagine what was happening back at the apartment. ‘Probably complete
chaos. Serves them both right for this mess.’ The brat sandwich arrived and
he was swiping some brown mustard on the char-scored meat when his cell rang.
He took a sip of beer and pressed the “On” button of the cell. “Hay-lo,” Zach
said with an exaggerated vibrato.
“Something’s
happened at our place…and I think you know what it is,” Gio said with a restrained,
level voice.
“What…sorry,
I can’t hear you. Can you hear me?”
“I
said that…”
“Can’t
make out anything. Let me go outside and call you back.”
“Okay,
we need…”
“Give
me five minutes.” Zach smiled at the small, first victory as he flagged over
the waitress. “Miss, I need to get home. Give me the check and bag the brat.
Okay?”
The
woman nodded with a wink and took his plate away. In a few minutes, the server
returned with a check and the ‘doggy’ bag. Zach finished his beer, placed
enough money on the table to take care of the tab and left the bar. He pushed
the speed dial button programmed for his home phone and stood on the quiet
Clark Street sidewalk.
~~~
“Um, Zach?” Gio tentatively answered.
“I’m
outside. I can hear you very clear. Whazzup?”
~~~
“I think you know. Ah, where did you put the other guy’s things?”
“Other
guy? Things? You have a houseguest?”
~~~
“We both know what the deal is – let’s talk about it later. Yes, there’s another
guy and everything he has is gone. Disappeared.”
“Everything?”
Zach asked with a quick retort.
~~~
“Everything but his coat and car key.”
“Then
listen and listen very carefully…I’m only going to say this once. I suggest
that you loan this gentleman some clothes – don’t even think of using mine
– and see if you can stay with him tonight. If he won’t put you up, find a
hotel. I don’t want to see your sorry ass until tomorrow. Maybe lunch at EatZi’s
before we have to be at work? By the way, I have it on good authority that
this guy’s stuff and keys are in the trunk of his car.” EatZi’s was a deli
on the first floor of the Century Mall. ‘And it’s public enough so both of
us won’t cause a scene…like me cutting off Gio’s balls while he’s screaming,’
Zach decided.
~~~
“Hold on for a minute.”
Zach
started down Clark Street to be closer to their corner while he held the phone
to his ear.
~~~
“Yeah, that seems to work. I’m, ah, sorry about…”
“I’ll
give you five minutes to be outta there. See ya at EatZi’s at 11:30 a.m. and
we’ll figure out if this relationship should go any further. Understand?”
~~~
“We’ll be gone. See ya at 11:30 tomorrow.”
“See
you tomorrow.” Zach cut off the cell, turned at Waveland and walked towards
the apartment. As he got closer, he saw Gio and George exit the front door.
Zach ducked into the shadowy corner of a doorway and watched the two walk
rapidly down the walk in the opposite direction to where the Lexus was parked.
‘Good. Letting this mellow overnight is the best.’ In the distance, he saw
the dome light of a vehicle come on, followed by the headlights. He assumed
that George had probably popped open the trunk to recover his ‘misplaced’
belongings. Finally the car – he knew it was the Lexus – started and swung
into the street. Zach watched as the taillights got smaller and finally disappeared
when the car turned the corner.
The
apartment – furnished in hand-me-down, second-hand chic – was pretty much
as he had left it that morning. There was no evidence that two guys in heat
had been there recently, urgently screwing. ‘Bastard,’ Zach thought when he
entered the bedroom. “At least the bed’s been changed.’ He knew the sheets
were a different color than the last time he’d been in the room. ‘One less
thing I need to do or worry about.’ The last thing he wanted to do was to
see peter tracks deposited by a stranger. He quickly changed into his usual
sweats, walked to the kitchen and placed the brat sandwich in the microwave
for a fast warming. As much as he wanted another beer, Zach settled for bottled
water to wash down the food.
Dr.
Laura was right: one of the mistakes a person makes in a marriage is to think
he can change the imbedded personality/moral flaws of the other person. Zach
would occasionally listen to the radio psychologist while he drove in the
city. While he didn’t like her feelings towards gays and lesbians, she dished
out some good, solid advice. He doubted that Gio could or would change. He
was also aware that accepting some sort of open relationship was alien to
everything he’d been brought up to believe. ‘What a fucking conundrum,’ he
considered.
The
brat tasted a little soggy and shopworn the second time around. Zach tossed
out half the sandwich into the waste can along with the empty water bottle.
He made a mental note to take out the trash in the morning – Wednesday was
pick-up day – and turned off the kitchen light. A fast review of the living
area didn’t reveal the drama that had occurred an hour earlier. ‘Christ, do
I just tell that horn dog that it’s all over and start from scratch?’ he wondered
as he walked back into the bedroom. ‘Just chuck a four-year relationship and
start all over?’ He stripped down to ‘nary a stitch’ and did his bathroom
routine. Gio and he slept in the nude even in the dead of winter.
The
bed looked so non-threatening; nothing to suggest that two randy guys had
been fucking not long ago. Zach turned off the lights and sighed as he pulled
down the covers to crawl in. He loved the feel of crisp, clean sheets. However,
tonight the reason the bedding had been changed was troubling. One thing was
constant. Even with fresh pillowcases, Zach could breathe in the scent of
Gio. ‘That asshole,’ he thought as he settled in and started stroking his
needy, unsatisfied cock. ‘I love you, babe but I just don’t know...’ The confinement
of the sheets as he aroused himself became cumbersome so he tossed the bedding
aside.
Skin
rubbing against skin was the only sound to penetrate the quiet of the warm
room. He looked down and studied his abs and navel that pointed the way to
a growing erection that was usually reserved for his partner. When Zach became
fully erect, he closed his eyes and slowly stroked the young manhood that
Gio found so appealing. The moisture that oozed from his slit aided his hand
as it moved on the cock like a piston. ‘Oh, shit, babe, why are you pushing
me to make a decision I don’t wanna make?’ The precum kept emitting; occasionally
he’d use his thumb to redistribute the natural lubricant.
On
and on the physical stimulus went. When Zach felt a sharp, pleasant rumbling
in his groin, he’d stop for a moment…until the potential release had passed.
He thought of Gio’s muscular body that was normally next to him. On the fourth
approach to the sexual cliff, Zach pushed himself over into orgasmic bliss.
“Oh, fuck,” he yelled to no one. His swollen, agitated, red cock erupted sperm
onto his face, chest and stomach. After resting a few moments, he smiled with
satisfaction and reached down to the floor and grabbed the trusty towel. He
wiped himself, tossed the anointed cumrag aside, pulled up the covers and
slipped off into a deep sleep.
*****
Gio arrived very early at the Century Mall. First
on the ‘things to do’ list was go up to Bally’s for a soak in the Jacuzzi
before a shower and shave. He had much to resolve for the luncheon meeting
with Zach. ‘How the hell could I have screwed up so badly?’ he thought as
he got into the hot, swirling, pulsing water and found the most active water
jet for his tense traps and deltoids. It was just after 10:00 a.m. and the
only other occupant in the recessed tub was an older woman reading a crinkled
National Examiner.
‘I’ve
always been pretty aggressive…well, since college when it was pretty easy
to cruise and pick up signals from someone who wanted to get off. Shee-it.
I have the greatest guy – a person who I love with all my heart – and I still
have to screw around.’ Gio arranged these thoughts in his mind while moving
his back around the pounding, forceful water flow. ‘I think I have it under
control and then some hot fucker comes along. Zach has every right to be pissed.’
For
the next 15 minutes Gio let the soaking and the aqua massage relax him. He
thought back to the previous night and George’s reaction when he discovered
all of his clothes had disappeared. While his visitor stewed and fumed, Gio
mentally beat himself for being so stupid as to have brought home a trick.
And that’s all it was: hosting on the sly a stud who had allowed Gio to ‘top’
for a change. Gio looked at the clock and saw it was just before eleven. ‘Gotta
take care of everything else,’ he thought after he stepped out of the Jacuzzi
and dried himself.
After
a quick shower and shave, he dressed in the same jeans and sweater he had
loaned George to get home 12 hours earlier. After Zach had told Gio what the
deal was with the clothes, wallet and keys, the mood in the apartment became
a little lighter. Gio apologized to George – not for the mischievousness but
for his lapse in judgment that had caused this reaction. His sexmate for the
night belatedly understood they had both been thinking with their smaller
heads and felt a little guilty about coming between the two partners. George
sympathetically agreed to allow Gio to spend the night at his place to defuse
the situation. But sleep was all that happened. After the events of the evening
neither was in the mood for further physical exploration.
The
café area of EatZi’s was still relatively quiet when Gio arrived promptly
at 11:30 a.m. He saw his blond partner sitting with his back to the door.
‘Here goes something, I hope,’ he thought as he walked to the table. “Um,
hi, Zach.” He sat down and looked into his partner’s blue eyes and winced
slightly. “I guess saying I’m sorry is pretty feeble. I know I fucked up but
I am really sorry.”
“Hi.”
Zach stared back and said nothing for a few moments. “I’m not even going to
ask you how you could have pulled this crap…it happened. I think we both needed
to take some time to figure things out. I know I did.”
“I
did, too. Babe, I love you so much. It’s just this friggin’ thing of straying
like an alley cat that happens once in a while.”
“Um,
I ordered the sandwich for both of us…figured we could split it. The extra
bottle of water is for you, too. Whatever we’re going to say, I don’t want
to be interrupted.” Zach pushed the sandwich into the middle of the table,
picked up the nearest half and bit into it.”
“Thanks.”
Gio mimicked his partner’s movements and chased down the first bite of the
ham sandwich with the water. ‘This is better than eating crow,’ he decided.
‘But all good things have to come to an end.’ The quietness coming from across
the table was not unusual. He knew Zach had a habit of being silent and sulked
when he was really pissed. “I guess the first thing to say is that I want
to figure out if we can still make a go of it.”
“We’ve
had this conversation before. Remember last summer at the ‘rocks’ and you
said this wouldn’t happen again?” Zach took another bite and looked down at
the table. “You tell me; how can we be a couple – life partners – if I never
know for sure what you’re doing…or who?”
“I
don’t have any excuses. I could say it’s a family thing. I dunno, maybe I
picked it up from my dad? He’s had something going on the side for a long
time. And my older brother keeps wandering off course from one bimbo to the
next.”
“Yeah?
What does that tell you? Your brother
had gone through two divorces before he was 32 and your wonderful mom just
puts up with it. I’m not goin’ to put up with it. And, if we can avoid it,
I don’t want a divorce or whatever happens when two guys separate.”
“I
was wrong – completely wrong – and I don’t want a divorce either. You’re looking
at the biggest ‘dumb shit’ of all time. Here I sit, with the most marvelous,
utterly hot, smart, loving guy and I let my dick steer me off course.
“How
many times have you, um, gone off course since we had our last discussion?”
“I
swear, Zach, this was the first time. I, um, listen…here’s the deal. If you
can let me back in your life I promise I’ll do everything possible to be faithful
and get back your trust.”
“And
how’s that going to happen? I want to believe you but I’ve been burned…a couple
of times.” Zach shrugged and took another bite. “I mean, what can I do? Shit…do
I need to work on my end of our sex life? You’ve told me why your dad strayed…your
brother, too, for that matter, because they wanted more, um, variety and frequency.
Let’s start there.”
“Well,
I guess we haven’t talked about, um, that stuff. Okay, here goes.” Gio took
a deep breath, sighed and continued, “Frequency certainly isn’t an issue.
But, yeah, I think that we need to spice up what happens in bed. We’re both
to blame for not talking. Point is, I’d like to be a little more versatile
in bed. I don’t know why…you’ve just always assumed that I wanted to be on
the bottom and I haven’t said anything.”
“You
mean that you’d like to, ah…” Zach said in a lower tone. He looked around
and added,” fuck me?”
“Yeah.
I really would. That bottom of yours is very sexy. And I think we should experiment
with some other things that might add a little more fun to making love.” Gio
sat back, smiled and took a drink from the water bottle.
“Anything
battery-operated?” Zach asked with a chuckle.
“That’s
a possibility.” Gio felt a little more relaxed. ‘This seems to be going well.’
He took a few more bites of the sandwich and contemplated the direction of
the conversation.
“I
take this suggestion very seriously, buddy. I’d love to explore and experiment
stuff with you…and you, only…but you may have to be the teacher. Now, let’s
talk about the other shit. You get the picture that I don’t want to share
you with anyone? If you don’t, we need to get some counseling…guidance from
a psychologist who can offer some effective suggestions on how to make this
relationship work…for both of us.”
“If
it’s something that would get us back on track for the long haul, I’d do anything.
Believe me, Babe, when I tell you that I love you very much and don’t want
to lose you.” Gio reached across the table and placed his hand on the back
of Zach’s hand.
“I
love you, too.” Zach rotated his hand around so that the two hands were palm
to palm. “We’ll take it one step at a time. Maybe we can find someone through
the Internet in who counsels gay couples Chicago. In the meantime, there’s
some things that I want to make very clear.” He looked into Gio’s eyes and
squeezed the hand tighter.
“Anything,
Hon.”
“Let’s
take a few days to kinda re-establish ourselves with each other. I promise
that I will be more open to talking things out before we get to a point of
getting into troubled waters. But here are three things that I want you to
consider. One, don’t even think about screwing around at the gym. Number two;
our apartment is off-limits for anything if you should fall off the wagon.
And number three; if that dick starts leading you around, figure out in advance
if that trick means more to you than me…cuz I’ll be outta here so fast you
won’t know what hit you.” Zach squeezed the hands even harder.
“Buddy,
I get the picture.”
“I
hope you do. Let’s go slow in the bed department. It’s going to take a few
days for me to digest what happened and what we’re going to do about it. My
WASP, Minnesota, buttoned-down mind needs to be let loose…and so does accepting
new ideas. But I’ll try. No, strike ‘try’ and replace it with “I’ll do it.”
“That
works for me.” Gio moved his hand up to Zach’s forearm and rubbed it for emphasis.
The
two men toasted with their plastic water bottles, cleared the table of trash,
and left the deli for a day at the gym but a new day in their relationship.
Gio knew what he had to do to clean up his act. And once the dust settled,
he would bring Zach to advanced levels of enjoyable lovemaking.
____________________
TO BE CONTINUED